Adoption thoughts

http://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2010/july/10.18.html?start=1

I'm not sure how to add links, so I am trying a couple of things. I hope it works.

This article was sent to me by someone I would call an adopted mother. She is not my mother by birth, but has claimed me as her daughter. Although I do already have a birth mother, whom I am very close to, I have aunts that are like second mothers to me as well. We all experience a form of adoption in our lives. When Joe and I got married, my family wrapped their arms around him. He calls them mom, dad, brother, etc. We have friends that we would call brothers and sisters. The church is our adopted family. I can't tell you how many people I know, including ourselves, that have been cared for like family through other Christians or even a church congregation. Even Jesus left his home town, lived life with and poured into his disciples. They had a bond of brotherhood.

The beauty in adoption is that we are accepted as we are. We don't have to earn love from the other person. We see faults in each other and even talk about most of them, but we love each other all the same. We confide in each other, correct each other, and encourage each other. That is what God does for his children. He has open arms ready to give us a voice. (Read the article about this.) He picks us up, brushes us off (which sometimes hurts), encourages us, and corrects us. He warns us about sin because He knows how bad it is for us. He does it because of His love for us. It is not a effort to control us. We don't deserve all of the goodness He offers. We don't deserve being adopted. But just the same, we ARE adopted and I am sooooo thankful for it.

HOW DEEP THE FATHER'S LOVE FOR US

How deep the Father's love for us
How vast beyond all measure
That He should give His only Son
And make a wretch His treasure

How great the pain of searing loss
The Father turns His face away
As wounds which mar the Chosen One
Bring many sons to glory

Behold the man upon the cross
My sin upon His shoulder
Ashamed I hear my mocking voice
Call out among the scoffers

It was my sin that held Him there
Until it was accomplished
His dying breath has brought me life
I know that it is finished

I will not boast in anything
No gifts, no power, no wisdom
But I will boast in Jesus Christ
His death and resurrection

Why should I gain from His reward
I cannot give an answer
But this I know with all my heart
His wounds have paid my ransom

Fingerprints went through!

At least that is what we were told. Joe and I got our prints done this morning. I REALLY hope we don't have to do that again, though. We had to leave the house at 6am to get there and wait in line for a little bit. We went through 3 lines before getting the prints. Thankfully, since we got there early, we didn't have to wait too long in the other lines. The woman who did Joe's prints, said his did fine. YAY!

I also have some exciting news for ME. We got patio furniture!!! I can't believe it! I plotted myself on the couch every morning willing myself to be content. But then Joe's co-worker went to Home Depot and looked at the patio set thinking of us. He came back and told Joe about this great deal. When we got there, the set he was talking about was gone, but the one I had been eying for months now was on sale. Actually, it was the bigger version of the one I wanted for way less than the price. I had also gotten paid for some of my extra summer work. Ever since we put it up, we have spend MUCH time back there talking and praying. I have enjoyed quiet time listening to the birds sing and have been reminded that God answers even the simplest prayers. We have even been able to see our neighbors and spend time with them. It has definitely been one more reason to trust God in providing what we need for this adoption and life afterward. I can see my heart changing about many things and softening in many areas. My hands are slowly letting go of their clutches and opening to receive His best for me.

Now we wait for the referral. I honestly have no idea how long that will take. Joe is the eager beaver and believes it will be any day now. I am a little more reserved and think it will be at least a couple of months. Either way, I am content for the time being. Just knowing that it is all just around the corner excites and stresses me at the same time. So, taking this time to rest and wait is just fine with me.

If you need me, I'll be sitting on my patio enjoying the view. . . : )

Enjoy the Journey

God answers prayers quickly sometimes! I woke up and got a summer schedule worked out. I also had time to pray and read. I was really convicted about trying to do things in my own strength, my own way. I was also convicted about being ungrateful. I have so many blessings to be thankful for that I shouldn't focus on what I want and don't have. Do I really need a patio set? No. I had a great time using the dining room table, which was an answer to prayer a little over a year ago. I realize that I waste so much time worrying or trying to work things out myself, that I miss out on the excitement of the "ride". An analogy I read this morning was about a boy that went on an amusement park ride with his dad. His dad was worried about his son possibly falling out but he looked over and his son was smiling the entire time. Afterward, he asked his son why he wasn't scared. His son told him that it was because his dad was next to him and knew that he would protect him. I want to be more like that boy with my heavenly father.

As the bulk of the adoption payment comes closer, I fear that we won't have enough money to cover it. I also still struggle with fear about how we will afford to live once we get our baby. What will things be like? What will our baby be like? What kind of problems will I have to deal with then? . . . There are so many fears that I know God will work out somehow. I need to give those fears to my father and enjoy this journey. I pray that you too will be able to enjoy this journey no matter what fears or problems you may be facing today.

(Oh, quick note: We got our gift report from Promise686 today. Many of you who have told me that you have given were not listed. Please make sure you put DeGuido adoption on the memo. If you forgot, either let me know or e-mail promise686.)

First immigration paperwork sent in

I already had the I-600A paperwork mostly filled out by the time the home study was approved. There were some confusing questions that I needed help answering and spent a couple of days finding them, but pretty much sent the form out quickly. So, another $830 has been spent. We are now waiting for Homeland Security to tell us where to get our next set of prints done and when. I'm almost positive it will be in Atlanta, which isn't too bad for me, but Joe may have to take more time off work.

Other than that, our adoption agency is working on getting our paperwork ready to send to Korea, which is really exciting. I have been reading other blogs from people who have adopted from South Korea and saw one that was where we are now a year ago. They got their home study approved in June and went to get their baby in January. I can't believe it may be that soon. But then again, I have read others that took longer. So, I'm trying not to get my hopes up too much.

In the meantime, I am tutoring 2 days a week and going to school most other weekdays to work on the projects I am doing. I finished one already! This next one will probably take me much of the summer, but it is nice to have a more flexible schedule. The only problem is that I haven't gotten a routine down yet. I am not getting good quiet time or bible reading done lately and I am feeling the effects. I'm sure Joe is feeling it too! LOL

So, please pray for both of us to stay connected with God and walk in the spirit. I am selfishly praying for a patio set for me to do my morning quiet time on. Joe is trying to save as much money as possible for the adoption and here I am ready to spend some of our extra money coming in. Maybe it is one of the consequences of not being connected. I do easily find myself discontented when that happens.

Also keep praying for protection for our baby, the birth mom and foster parents. We are probably a few weeks to a few months away from a referral. We can either accept or pass on the referral. We need discernment on whether the first baby referred is the one God wants us to have.

We should be hearing from Promise686 soon as to how much support we have raised so far. I apologize to anyone who has sent in a donation and has not received a response from us. We have not received a list of contributors. We should be getting something soon though.

Thank you to all who are following and encouraging us. We have been so blessed to know that people want to be apart of all of this. Your prayers are so needed and appreciated!

Support Letter

Dear Friends and Family,

Many of you already know that Joe and I are in the process of adopting a child from South Korea. Some of you may not know the story of how God has lead us to this decision.

Joe and I have wanted to have children since we first got married 4 years ago. 2 years ago, we started looking into why it hadn’t happened yet and did not find any reason to believe it was impossible. After 2 more years of actively trying to use medical help, we began to feel sad, frustrated, and a bit angry. However, we took those feelings to God and prayed for hearts of worship in the waiting.

When we were dating, we both shared a heart to one day adopt. So, we started looking into it over a year and a half ago. We looked into fostering, adopting domestically, and internationally. Joe kept saying that he wanted a Korean baby. I, of course, didn’t argue since I come from a Korean family. The cost just seemed too overwhelming. So, we thought about adopting an American-born Korean baby. Everywhere we went, they suggested we adopt straight from Korea. We felt like God was shutting down doors, and we couldn’t see us being able to afford to adopt a child internationally. We couldn’t even afford to pay for the home study to get started.

We decided that God would have to give us a definite “green light” before we would pursue it. Over the summer, one of my former student’s parents had told us that God laid us on their hearts to help us with adoption. We were excited and brought it to God. We didn’t get the “green light” yet, but it was a spark of hope. There were also many other signs, like the fact that I have a student who was adopted and another student whose parents are in the process of adopting. The father of this student also works with Promise 686 in helping people with legal assistance domestically. We had even begun preparing a baby room because God told us to “enlarge our tent” and “spare no expense”. But months passed. We kept laying it at God’s feet and trying to trust, but we were beginning to feel depressed because we saw so many people get married, get pregnant, have one child, and then have another child. We were just waiting for one. But God taught us so much during this time and was preparing us.

Two Fridays in a row, I heard God speak very quietly to me the word “adopt” but dismissed it because I thought it was my flesh looking for any way to get a baby. About a week later, we went to have dinner with one of my students and his family. While we were talking they brought up their hearts for adoption and a desire to help a family adopt. We told them that we had a heart to adopt but were waiting for the right time. That night, I couldn’t sleep. I went to the baby room to pray and read the Bible. I was reading in Psalms and felt encouraged and filled by the spirit. Then, I read the passage that talks about how we are knitted in our mother’s womb. All of a sudden, I had a strong urge to pray for protection of our baby that was in another woman’s womb. That is when I realized God was giving me a strong kick to move. I shared my experience with Joe, and he was ready. He has a conviction that this is where God is leading us. Joe, being a man of faith, believes it is going to happen without question. I’m the one who struggles with the when and how.

We are hoping to find out if our baby is a boy or girl by July. It may take a year or less before we can bring our baby home. We are traveling to Korea to get our baby, and my mom may come with us. We still have family there we can visit. This may also help with traveling costs. The total estimated cost is about $40,000.00

God has brought us through the home study and softened our hearts to let others join us through this journey. Raising support for mission trips was difficult enough for me because I have generally been so self-sufficient. It is also a new concept to raise support for adoption. But, it has been a blessing to us to see friends and family so willing to give what they can—things like passing on baby items, offering to help financially, or blessing us with the power of prayer. It has been a truer model of the body of Christ and our adoption into the kingdom of God. We would like to ask you to join us through this journey as well. We only ask you to give what God lays on your hearts to give.

- Please let us know if you would like to support us through prayer. We will send out updated prayer requests throughout the process. We have a blog that you can also follow to see where we are in the journey. The blog site is http://babyseedsoffaith.blogspot.com/. It is named after the seeds of faith God has called us to plant throughout this process. He has been so faithful already!!!

- Contact me if you have any baby items that you would like to pass on to us as well. Kimdeguido@bellsouth.net We can use anything from furniture to diapers (9-18 months).

- If you are led to help financially, you can give a tax-deductible gift. We are working with Promise686 (www.promise686.org). They are providing us with a community of support and an Adoption Matching Grant to help us bring our Korean baby home. The donations will be matched by Promise686 up to $4,000, thus multiplying any gifts. There is no administrative cost either! (See the attached form for more information about Promise686.)

Please make checks payable to: Promise686, Inc. You may preference how the donation might be used by writing “DeGuido Adoption” in the memo section of your check.

(Note: per IRS guidelines, promise686 maintains complete discretion and control over the use of all donated funds, but intends to honor donor's suggested use.)

Mail checks to:

Promise686, Inc

3600 River Ferry Drive

Alpharetta, GA 30022

We are looking forward to seeing more of God’s faithfulness and would love to hear how God is calling you to participate. We have already heard stories of God putting prayer on hearts to pray for our baby even before we knew we were adopting. We would love to share those stories with our baby and let him/her see how the body of Christ brought us together.

God bless,

Joe and Kim DeGuido

mountain climbing

Joe and I spent the last few days with some of my mom's side of the family. We hiked in the rain, walked around town, napped, and climbed this part of the mountain. Well, some of us climbed. I have never climbed anything like that without repelling gear. So, it was a bit scary. But the feeling of accomplishment and the beautiful view was well worth the climb.

As I was climbing up, I had to maneuver my hands and feet. There were times I had to stop and look around for the next best move. Most of all, I had to pray that I wouldn't slip or fall. Knowing that God is with me calmed my nerves and helped me to move ahead.

I feel like that with this adoption process. I struggle with fear and frustration. But prayer and walking with Jesus helps. I know that these delays are for a reason. Probably ones that I will never completely understand. Maybe he is delaying it so that we will be ready for a referral when our baby is ready to be referred. I'm glad that I don't have to have all of the answers.

Good news!!! The home study has finally been sent out. We should get it any day now!!!

Who'd a thought. . . .

I remember hearing stories of how people said their home study took longer than expected and thinking, "If I follow all of this advice and get all the paperwork done quickly, that won't happen to us." WRONG!!! It is a little bit amusing to me now. (maybe not a week or two or three ago. . . )

I sort of lost the excitement of the process this past week. I think I was tired of the hopeful expectation of moving forward and being disappointed over and over. Once again, when I gave up the desire to rush, things slowly began to move. So, Joe's background check has been received and the official home study really should be done this week. From my understanding, Korea doesn't have much paperwork for the dossier as many other countries. PRAISE GOD!!!
I guess we find out when our agency reviews the home study and gets back in touch with us. Because most of it was already done, they have already received the rough draft and (I think) approved us to move forward already. YAY!!!

We start raising support soon. We have decided to make a prayer support-team e-mail or Facebook list. We can include more personal needs and prayer requests that way. I am going to try to figure out how to post our support letter on this blog somehow so that those who are interested can read it. We sang a song in church today that said, "If our God is for us, then who can stand against us?" It was such a great reminder of why I need to stop worrying, but also why prayer support is so important. Financial support is going to help us with paying for the adoption, but prayer support is going to get us and our child through the battle.

Thank you to those who have already been praying! Keep it up! God is definitely working in all of our lives already.